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Enjoy a vivid descrition of the Funky Chicken, by Nick Thom Expert Racer and Freelance Writer… Raced from the 30+ Expert Line. Grass Track: A 30’ wide motorcycle course laid out on grassy hillsides consisting mostly of smooth off camber left and right turns. Roots. Roots, dark woods, and grass tracks. Roots, dark woods, grass tracks, and exhaustion, but mostly roots, wet shiny slippery roots. Everyone was talking about the slippery grass track, how someone always crashes in the first turn. They had me second-guessing my ability to negotiate it successfully, but it didn’t get me, I came out of it 2nd, with 15 bikes chasing me. I’d say it was the seventh turn that got me. I spun the rear up and lowsided, the bad news was that we were still really bunched up, the good news was that everyone was tiptoeing around the course and I was able to get back going in third, phew, that was lucky. We did some grass track then a long straight narrow trail, past an excavator (what?) across a road and into the trees. A minute or two of single track and we got to our first downhill, nothing extreme, but containing some loose moist dirt and a left hand turn in the middle. I went in too hot and slid into the bushes at the turn, two more bikes got me. Dang, this isn’t going as well as I hoped it would. We had miles of wooded trails, generally straighter than you would expect but containing roots that would send you every which way. Every now and then we’d pop out and do some serpentine trail cut into the bushes or through an x-mas tree farm but mostly we were in the woods. Some so dark a headlight would have helped. At about midway we hit part 2 of the grass track, then headed down, crossed a mudhole, and got into more woods. Just when you figured you had gone about 90 miles we came to the same grassy hillside, did the final 1/3 of the grass track and finished the 14.5 mile lap, my time, 44 minutes. I was in 4th. Lap 2 Kane came flying past me like a pro. Then Nate caught and passed me. Typically, I pass Nate then he watches my lines and passes me back so this was a nice reversal. As I followed Nate, Robert Brumit got in between us, Josh got behind me, and John Wells got behind him. I passed Robert and Nate back but then missed a turn and had to back the bike up, they both went by and I was in front of Josh again. I got back around Robert and followed Nate all the way to the home check. Funny that we should drive 500 miles just to race side by side with guys from back home. Lap 3 I was trying to pass Robert and I made a mistake on the same downhill that I slipped on the first lap. John Wells passed both me and Josh then we all got around Robert. John stuffed his way past Nate at the entrance to a bushy trail and took off, flying. Again I followed Nate all the way to the home check, this turned out to be our fastest lap of the race. I was pushing hard and having trouble keeping the bike in control. I had misjudged the dirt, thinking it would be softer, so my tires were too open and my suspension too stiff. Consequently, when I pushed real hard the bike would deflect off the roots causing no small number of near disasters. Josh had derailed his chain in a mudhole and dropped back about three minutes. At the end of 3 I pitted, taking the time to adjust my suspension making for a longish pit of around 50 seconds. Nate and Robert kept going. With the new settings I felt much better and took off to catch them both. Nate had hit the wall physically and let me by easy. I caught Robert in a wide open field and flew past a gear higher than he was riding. At the end of 4 I had a nice gap on both those guys and felt good about my riding, three hours had elapsed. Lap 5 started off fine but then it started to rain. I missed the same turn I had missed on lap two, got the bike straightened out, started it, then stalled it and fell over to the downhill side. I was starting to panic, I did my best clean and jerk to get the bike on its wheels, got on and here came Robert. I got going just in front of him but I was out of energy and on the next tricky root section I got stuck, Robert passed me and I never saw him again. All this happened in the section of trail they called ‘Cyanide’, it killed me every lap. Whereas the roots had seemed slimy and slippery before, once it started raining the mud slicked trail quickly became the more formidable challenge. I popped out onto the grass track part deux and dang if it wasn’t slipperier than Carnegie in a rain storm. I rode off the line, in the grass, crisscrossing the course and on one uphill alone I passed 5 bikes. One of whom was Kurt Ashley, another back home rider who had passed me earlier in the lap. I managed to stay out of trouble but I was too slow to pick it up when the rain stopped or maybe I was just too tired. I caught one last bike at the final grass track but couldn’t make the pass. Unfortunately, that bike took 3rd, three seconds ahead of me in fourth. No luck there. Very fun, Kane, Robert, and Kurt showed me exactly why I am not riding the senior class, those guys are too fast. Even more impressive, Kane dislocated his shoulder on the first lap, it popped back in when he stood up but he did the entire race injured, finishing second in his class. My other travel mate, Tyler Brumit (Contagious TB) flew in the 250A class finishing fourth. Unfortunately my exertion weakened my immune system and now I have Contagious TB’s cold. If you go be ready for small braking bumps, holes, and roots, and dirt that is on the hard pack side. Also, be ready for rain, even in June. |
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